Showing posts with label Business. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Business. Show all posts
20 Rules in Office
1. Rule 1. - The Boss is always right.
2. Rule 2. - If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.
3. Those who work get more work. Others get pay, perks, and
promotions.
4. Ph.D. stands for "Pull Him Down". The more intelligent a
person, the more hardworking a person, the more committed a person; the more
number of persons are engaged in pulling that person
down.
5. If you are good, you will get all the work. If you are
really good, you will get out of it.
6.. When the Bosses talk about improving productivity, they are
never talking about themselves.
7. It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say
you've done and what you are going to do.
8. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in
the butt.
9. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't
be promoted.
10. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going
to get.
11. If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use
being a damn fool about it...
12. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look
worried.
13.. Following the rules will not get the job
done.
14. If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get
done.
15. Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous"
.
16. No matter how much you do, you never do
enough.
17. You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work
you are supposed to be doing.
18. In order to get a promotion, you need not necessarily know
your job.
19. In order to get a promotion, you only need to pretend that
you know your job.
20. The last person that quit or was fired will be held
responsible for everything that goes wrong.
2. Rule 2. - If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.
3. Those who work get more work. Others get pay, perks, and
promotions.
4. Ph.D. stands for "Pull Him Down". The more intelligent a
person, the more hardworking a person, the more committed a person; the more
number of persons are engaged in pulling that person
down.
5. If you are good, you will get all the work. If you are
really good, you will get out of it.
6.. When the Bosses talk about improving productivity, they are
never talking about themselves.
7. It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say
you've done and what you are going to do.
8. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in
the butt.
9. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't
be promoted.
10. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going
to get.
11. If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use
being a damn fool about it...
12. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look
worried.
13.. Following the rules will not get the job
done.
14. If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get
done.
15. Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous"
.
16. No matter how much you do, you never do
enough.
17. You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work
you are supposed to be doing.
18. In order to get a promotion, you need not necessarily know
your job.
19. In order to get a promotion, you only need to pretend that
you know your job.
20. The last person that quit or was fired will be held
responsible for everything that goes wrong.
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