Weekend Humour - Women, Please Excuse

*When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.*😆😆😆🤣😂
_~By Lee Majors_

*After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.*
_~By Al Gore_
*By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.*🤔🤣😤😂
_~By Socrates_

*Woman inspires us to great things and prevents us from achieving them.*
_~By Mike Tyson_

*The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?*
_~By George Clooney_

*I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.*
_~By Bill Clinton_

*"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays."*
_~By George W. Bush_

*"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."*

_~By Rudy Giuliani_

*"I've had bad luck with all my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t.” The third gave me more children!*
_~By Donald Trump_

*Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming*
*1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,*
*2. Whenever you're right, shut up.*
_~By Shaquille O’Neal_

*The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.*
_~By Kobe Bryant_

*You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.*
_~By David Hasselhoff_

*My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.*
_~By Alec Baldwin_

*A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.*
_~By Barack Obama_

*Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.*
_~By Tommy Lee_

*A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters.  They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."*
_~By Brad Pitt_

*First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"*
*Second Guy : "You're lucky, mine's still alive."*
_~ By Jimmy Kimmel_

*“First there is the promise ring, then the engagement ring, then the wedding ring...soon after....comes SuffeRing!*
_~By Jay Leno_

*"The reason why wives live longer is because they don't have a Wife"*
_~By Brandon Breezy_

*To all the guys to give them a good laugh .......and to the ladies with good sense of humour who can handle it!!!!!!!